archive of 'private and secrets'
… and something else
When I started my traveling in 2007 in New York, it took me a long while until I was able to take pictures of people. Nowadays I don’t care anymore, I just shoot when I feel like and people getting irritated yes, but they going to survive. Its time no in India, and especially India, that I photograph the things we don’t want to see in our country. Basically means: Yes, travel photography will be still there but I am definitely going now in the direction I always wanted to go, photojournalism.
it is what it is
India, what a difficult country to travel, India, what a pain in the ass it can be, India, everybody is cheating and have no moral for right and false. India, the place where people are really incredible ruud.
Those quotes are very often to hear from backpackers who are in India or just came from India. I got really influenced by those opinions and I had a hard time not listen to much to those things instead make my own experience. So far, I really try to find these people in India, but everybody is nice and fair and I am coming slowly to the point that not the indians are the people who act strange, the backpackers are. They have sometimes expectations of other countries that I would like to know what they think when they come over in this country.
India isn’t that crazy as people say and I think people really like to exhaturate. Especially when traveling alone, people talk more and want to be heard. When I stayed in Karimabad, the very nice place in northern Pakistan, people told me about Rawapindi and its shit hole qualities. I went to Rawapindi and I thought its a really great place to explore.
India has been great so far and I think when show people you treat them with respect and show them in the same time that they can’t cheat on you, you gonna be fine. Its not only the way they deal with you, it is as important how you react as well.
people jut want to see the positive things of a country and as soon as they get confronted with more difficult issues they can’t deal, they blame the country and its people instead of think about their own attitude. I am very surprised how many tourists you find here who just came for a couple of weeks from their country, traveling in groups or even booked all inclusive.
I remember when I left Germany that India should be a thing you shouldn’t start with, because the difference will be enormous. But I never thought of the idea that those people might be wrong and India isn’t that crazy as everybody says. Maybe I am a little crazy too and therefore can deal better with crazy countries. Whatever it is, India is a great country, it is a great country yes, as every country in this world. And if you show the people that you are not afraid of them and respect them, you will be always on the safe side. Exceptions exist.
Its going to be my last country I travel to after 17 month and I am trying to get the most out of it, even though its only 3 weeks.
India, BUCKLE UP. I am going to annoy YOU. hahahaha
last night
I will spend my last night tonight here in Gilgit, in the north of Pakistan before I head down to Islamabad again to pick up my visa for India and carry on traveling the same day to Lahore. Long sentence, puh. I will have a look to Lahore for about three days and see a local dance thing what somebody told me, before I go to India. Its gonna be more or less a tough journey in India, since I want to see a lot and do not have much time for it. I will go to Delhi, Agra, Varanasi, Kolkata, fly from there to Goa, hang out in the South and finally to Chennai. Within this incredible fast journey I’ll try to visit also one of these places where you only eat, sit and sleep for 10 days. I don’t really know how I want to manage all those things, but I also don’t really care if I do it or not. Most of the times I set myself a plan up to change it afterwards again - more exciting that way.
Sounds good to me. On this journey I will finally start to take pictures, where people gonna say: “Haha, That’s funny, look at his head” or “Wow, he has only 1 leg” or “cool, his face looks so funny”. Since people need to be excited or shocked when confronted with pictures and since I want to make my money with photography I should go for it. Instead of finding the soul of people and capture it in picture and … whatever. I see where I have to go on my way of photography and I know what is still missing in my pictures, which is a good thing to know isn’t it ?!
So, buckle up and enjoy the most incredible pictures you ever have seen before. Well, that’s more my expectation and actually shouldn’tbe yours.
pb with ph
What I wrote today in the morning sun:
Again, its coming: Just to enjoy life. Don’t think about any pressure of traveling, job opportunities, money, things you need to organize. Its such a beautiful pure feeling. A goose bump goes from your toes to the tip of your hair and back into your toes. Since I experienced this feeling already I know its not a state of being for long. You get thrown back into society, into responsibility and agreements with others who surround you.
But the more you experience this state of being, the easier you get back into it. And since I know from the awesome movie “I Heart Huckabees”, its never a feeling you can come back to whenever you want. Life is ruled by cruelty, depression and pressure. And the good thing about knowing these experiences made by the devil, you can enjoy the other side (no thoughts and doubts, just watching) so much more.
Sometimes it happens:
You sit somewhere, you watch the people walk by, enjoy the staining landscape and listen to a song. And all of a sudden it throws you back in all your experiences from traveling, people you know, landscapes, situations, food and even the time before your travel time. Like your entire life runs through your vanes and happiness goes through your body, your mind. Its the most beautiful feeling I ever know.
You’re flying from thought to thought, from memory to memory … a Woah! feeling. It seems to be the same idea of a feeling people talk about who almost died and went in a second through their whole life and peace and freedom comes all over them.
Already little things are able to trigger this amazing feeling. It could be a Bird flying by, a man waving, a breeze blowing, a sun coming through clouds or even a leaf falling down from a tree. I thought about how to awake this feeling on purpose, but if I would figure out how, it wouldn’t come surprisingly anymore. And that’s another important part of it. You don’t know when you get it the next time. Like my panic attacks.
It seems to be that I need to have my panic attacks in order to get these amazing feelings. Thank you panic attacks. You take so much care of me.
Lets give it a name:
pure being accompanied with pure happiness. Very good.
punch buggy ’schulz’, no punch back
Since coming to the States, I do not feel any inspiration to take pictures. Everything is too clean, too perfect and too done. Maybe its just my eyes and my mind, not be able to see the mistakes in all this. Or maybe its me again, want to understand something in a time which is too short to understand.
The question is the following: Does a photographer need to be able to shoot everywhere in this world or can he claim to be inspired only by certain places? The answer seems to be there already. Speaking of inspiration shows already that the photographer, in this case, I, is more likely an artist instead of a photographer. The fact that I don’t want to be an artist doesn’t help in this case. I have to deal with it.
The following pictures show my boredom of my style and my aggression towards making something different out of my pictures. Enjoy or don’t. I don’t care these days.
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no title
Its a bit like in the German board game Scotland Yard when Mr. X shows up only every 6 moves. Since I lost my last pair of contacts I came back to glasses.
